Club Cheval

For those of you digging up that 9V power drill hidden deep in the asscrack of your toolshed / garage / sugar cupboard / wherever in response to the spate of shitty Dutch House that has been taking over the electro-house scene (cue end scene in Aronofsky's Pi), there is good news and great news.

Good news: You will cease to exist and do your part in curtailing the advances of global warming.

Great news: How many of you remember rocking your anuses off to Canblaster's dizzying summer hit, "Chicken Run"? Top Billin -- the DJ collective from Finland consisting of Sir Nenis, Fiskars and Flipperi, Anonymous, and J-Laini & Tane Lee -- has commissioned Club Cheval -- yet another DJ collective based in Paris made up of Canblaster, Panteros666, Sam Tiba, and MYD -- to make a follow-up to their massive Club Cheval EP, unironically named Club Cheval Remixed.

VARIOUS ARTISTS - CLUB CHEVAL REMIXED by TOP BILLIN

Squeaks, chirps, fat kicks and snares: these are the ingredients that make Dutch house so damn.. Dutchey. But somehow these guys forgo the regurgitated and redigested shit-formula in favor for sweaty club-friendly hits that will get even the music nerds to fist-pump their way into women's vaginas everywhere.

My personal favorites are Rob Threezy's punch-to-the-taint rework of the aforementioned "Chicken Run" and both remixes of the already excellent sub-bass killer "Barbie Weed." The Spox Remix gives the song more big-room appeal, while Subkittenz' effort really smoothes out the timbre by giving it a nice UK Grime vibe not unlike the wares of the big bosses over at Night Slugs.

Look for the EP to be released on the 28th this month! It's certainly a refreshing take on something that's obviously so massively appealing. Let's just hope the frat boys and club sluts don't ruin this brief moment of magic for the true music lovers out there.